Thursday, January 13, 2011

Changing My Name

Well it has happened. Not that I haven't seen this coming for a very long time. No, I've seen little indications here and there, signs along the road if you will, but I chose to ignore them. Well this car came to a screeching halt at the edge of a cliff this morning. There is just no more denying the truth.

Deep breath... I sound like my mother. There. I said it. It's not pretty, but there it is. This morning was filled with a barrage of "Mom?" "Mommy?" "Momma?" and the dreaded Mooooommmmmyyyy!!!!" which sounds very much like a dying siren. I actually said the words, no, said isn't quite right, more like growled the words, "I AM CHANGING MY NAME AND I'M NOT TELLING YOU WHAT IT IS!"

But I have to tell you, my youngest, knocked the wind out of my sails, she had a retort that was much wittier than anything I ever said to my mom when presented with that line (which was often as I recall). She looked up and said in her chipper little voice, "That's okay, I'll still call you Mommy." Admittedly, I had to laugh.

But it doesn't stop there, I'm sad to say. Ah, there are more and more "momisms" being uttered around here these days. See the thing is, I thought my mother had lost a few marbles when she said some of these gems. Now not only am I saying them I understand why she said them! Perhaps I should look into getting a grant and studying the effects of motherhood on sanity.

Take the other night for example. Now for the most part, anyone who knows me well, will tell you I am a touchy-feely, affectionate, cuddly person. However, after an entire day with my girls, sitting down on the couch with the family to watch a show and being covered in small people (and a hairy dog) was not my idea of a good time. I gently tried to remove children, only to discover them attaching to my hips, and leaning over me. Oh and the dog has now given me a pair of fur pants from the knees down.

And then it happened, "I don't want to be hampered!" I yelled and jumped up narrowly missing the large furry dog rug at my feet. My little ones looked confused and one said, "we aren't putting dirty clothes on you." My husband just shakes his head and says, "They just want to be close to you." I snort and think Says the guy who gets to sit in cube by himself all day!

So here it is, someday when you least expect it, you are going to sound like one (or both because Pop you don't get off scot-free) of your parents. And chances are, it isn't going to be pretty. I have even said the dreaded "stop that crying or I'll give you something to cry about." Now I can say with some certainty that I was warned about this and I just thought I would never succumb to such nonsense. SURPRISE!

Don't Say I Didn't Tell You,


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